Goals = Empty Promises

Last night I lied to someone about what I’ve been doing with my life. I’ve written about 10 pages of a book. When I first came up with the concept for the novel, I was typing away and then something happened; I got bored. I thought to myself, “If you’re bored writing it, then who the fuck would want to read it.” I’ve always done that though. I’ve had creative ideas that I get bored with and give them up as quickly as they came. 

The same thing will probably happen with this blog. I don’t want it to, but why continue something when you’re bored of it. 

So last night my ex-boyfriends roommate called to catch up. He told me that he missed having me around and to be honest, yeah I miss it too. Of course I do, but the last thing I said to my ex was that I hated him and that he was an asshole. I can’t really take those things back, mainly because it was the truth. I listened and listen to him incessantly bitch about work, but he couldn’t remember the simplest things about my life. I’m surprised he even remembered my birthday. 

His roommate asked me what I’ve been up to and I told him I had 50 pages of my book completed. I also told him about how great I’ve been and I guess it was just to save face. I’d like to think that everyone has been in that situation. Especially because I don’t want my ex to know that I don’t really know what that next step is. 

Everyone is always so confident about their lives. Are we all just trying to save face? Maybe we’re all equally as confused and just don’t want to admit it to the world. 


One thought on “Goals = Empty Promises

  1. I think about this ALL the time. Mostly because I’m not always stretching the truth in order to save face (though I do that often too), but because it is easier to say something simple than something complicated. Sometimes it’s just way too much work to explain to someone I’m living at home and working with my dad and it’s all okay. Sometimes I just don’t feel like defending myself or analyzing how this person is going to react (or how they’re going to pass on what I’ve told them to other people). Sometimes it’s easier to just say I’ve got a job at a place and I’m happy. In the years since I graduated I’ve even started telling people on buses/airplanes/bars I’m a student… It’s sad that we feel like we have to lie, but sometimes the wrong facts can help people feel the right emotions..

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