That One Time Julie and Dave Fucked…And Everyone Freaked Out

Meet Dave: Dave is a nice guy, has a tendency to sleep around and date multiple girls at once.

Now Meet Julie: Since Julie works for a teen magazine, she never has to grow up. This means when she drinks, she is out of control.

On the characters page, I wrote a brief summary of my group of friends. To sum it up, Kiley met Dave at a bar, they hit it off and everyone came together as friends because of them. Kiley had a major crush on Dave, but Dave was worried that anything more than a friendship would tear the group a part. As a result Kiley took her feelings and shoved them somewhere, somewhere being the bottom of a vodka bottle.

One night, everyone was drunk, as we are most nights. We all hung out at the boys house and I noticed Julie and Dave drunkenly conversing on the couch. and that was the end of the night. I got home, went to bed and woke up ready for brunch with my friends.

As we sat at the table I looked over at Julie. I noticed her make-up was all over her face, her hair was in disarray  and she was wearing the same clothes from the previous night. I leaned over to Sam:

Me: So, whose bed did Julie end up in last night?
Sam: I really don’t want to point fingers, but… (points to Dave)

I quickly texted her under the table.

Julie: Ugh, yes… 😦
Me: I wouldn’t tell Kiley.

Inevitably, in a close knit group, Kiley found out about 20 minutes later.

Now, I pride myself on staying far away from the drama, albeit airing our dirty laundry on this site, but EVERYONE lost their shit. To this day, I have no idea how it escalated the way that it did, but:

Dave told Kiley that she needed to get over him because he was sick of her getting upset.
Kiley, who wasn’t even that upset, told Dave not to have sex with all her friends unless he was seriously into one of them.
Sam was openly gossiping about it when Kiley yelled at him and told him to mind his own damn business.
Julie texted Kiley and apologized and tried to blame Dave for the whole situation.
Instead of telling Kiley what she needed to hear, Liv tried to stray away from conversations about the topic, only making Kiley more mad.

and where was I? Smoking a cigarette.


My Best Friend is “Trying”

My best friend from back home is trying to have her second child. Granted, she was knocked up by a huge d-bag when she was 19 and had her first child at 20. However, now she is almost 24 and married (to a different guy) who adopted her child and is raising him as his own. I know, how does one find a boyfriend when said person is pregnant? I will never know.

I called her last night and we talked for about three hours. Here’s a couple things you should know about this friendship.

When we were in high school me and my friend, Mia, went to a house party. I decided to bring along this guy Greg because I wanted to hook up with him. We got to the party and I ran into a different boy I’d had a crush on forever. I decided that I really didn’t want to hook up with Greg and told Mia she should definitely go for him! He was cute, nice, and so on. Little did I know, four years and a horrible on-and-off relationship later, she would get knocked up and he would break up with her by writing her a note in her diary.

Technically, and I say technically in the most liberal way possible, her baby, her marriage and her life is all because of me. I don’t really know whether that is a good or a bad thing, but we will pretend that it’s great.

I never thought that I would get to an age where people were trying to get pregnant. I never thought about planned pregnancies as a thing until last night. She told me that I should find someone and settle down. In my mind, finding someone feels like the end of my own life. It’s not even that I’m not trying to find someone, but in Los Angeles, no one is focused on serious relationships until way later in life. Every time I blink another year goes by and I don’t seem to be progressing at all.

Today I decided to be happy about my life. I have a new job and I will be getting a weekend job on top of that to make the amount of money I need to live and OKCupid told me today that I’m one of the hottest people on the site… GREAT. I’m going to make a whole post about the best OKC messages I’ve received… It’s very sad.


The Downside of Media

First of all, I should start this article by saying, I absolutely love watching tv, movies and catching up on my daily dose of celebrity news. 

I just started watching Game of Thrones. I know, I know, I’m late as fuck to the party, but I’m poor so give me a break. Here’s the problem: I have become so deeply involved in the show that I don’t even want to leave my house. 

I schedule times to hang out with my friends so we can have viewing parties of certain shows. When did we become so obsessed with living through other people, real or fictional? I catch myself thinking that if I were in the show, I would totally plot King Joffrey’s death. 

There are so many outlets: cable, Netflix, DVDs, iTunes movies and TV, Hulu, HBO Go, etc. and all we want to do is watch everything we possibly can. I don’t even know what a day without Facebook and Social Media is like. 

I once thought to myself that I was going to cut out everything. Texting, Facebook, Twitter, but it has become impossible. Don’t get me wrong, I hate seeing engagements and pregnancies on Facebook, but I’m looking at them! Why? I don’t even know. I always creep on my Facebook friends to see what’s going on in their lives. 

It seems as though we would rather live through other peoples lives versus our own. 


The Dreaded Backslide

I’m ready for Siri to tell me that I’m too drunk to send a text. I wish that she would yell at me and tell me I’m going to regret that in the morning.

Two and a half months ago I told my ex he was an asshole and I hated him. We haven’t spoken since. That is until last night, when my drunk ass made a fool of myself asking him if he ever really cared about me. Even in my drunken state, I quickly apologized and told him to forget I asked something like that, but it was too late.

Kiley, Bradley and I went out to a birthday party last night. We pre-gamed at Kiley’s with vodka shots and headed out to the first bar around 10. Around 9 PM every Friday at least one of us is in contact with the boys, but last weekend we bailed on them. Me and Bradley quickly realized that so long as Sam and TJ had feelings for us, we wouldn’t be able to meet new people with them around.

I decided to ask Sam if they guys were mad at us. He said no, but that lately everyone is saying that we need to take a break and that we’re too codependent on each other. I agreed and told him that I think him and TJ need time to move on from us and that I didn’t really know how he felt because I always heard it secondhand.

I received this text in response: “Sorry, I know I’m not the most direct person, but how I feel is this – I like you and always have. There is no one I enjoy hanging out with more because you crack me up and call me retarded when I get lost in the Beverly Center, and whenever there’s something on my mind, I know I can tell you about it. At the end of the day, if you were to ask me if I could be with anyone, it would be you.”

Basically the nicest thing any one has ever said to me and I still didn’t feel anything for him. I feel like I sit here and complain about wanting a guy like that and yet, when it happens, I don’t want it. I think it would be different with the right person, but I haven’t found that yet.

Needless to say, I took that moment to get absolutely wasted, which leaded to the dreaded backslide conversation with Jason, my ex.

We ended up at, The Surly Goat, a dive bar by The Grove, where I proceeded to meet some French guys and danced the rest of the night away with them. Me and Bradley headed back to Kiley’s and slept through our hangovers.

Today I woke up with a text from Jason and from Sam and I realized that I would have to deal with my drunken mistakes. I made a short casual conversation that ended quickly with Jason and avoided a face-to-face conversation with Sam because I flat out told him that I would never be more than friends with him. I knew it would kill me to have to say it to his face.

All I can say is that I am mad at myself for backsliding, but I’m happy I finally made Sam realize that he needs to move on.


Good Morning, Quarter-Life Crisis

I woke up this morning, ready to apply to jobs like I do every morning and this video popped up on my newsfeed.

Here’s what I don’t understand. How does Mark Zuckerberg know everything about me? Mainly I’m being sarcastic here, because I know Google can take words that I’m saying and places that I’m searching to put the right ads in front of me, but I still think it’s creepy.

Here are the daily ads I get via Facebook: Online Dating apps, Something about adopting a pet so I’m not alone, and ads for all the clothing that I can’t afford.

In a nutshell, It’s not helping the whole Quarter-Life Crisis situation. So thank you Mark Zuckerberg for reminding me on a daily basis that I need a boyfriend and a job.


The Sam Story

I love my group of friends. In fact we are all so codependent on each other that we rarely go a day without a big group text that lasts throughout the entire day. 

The first time I met Sam I was on the rebound from my ex. There’s really only a couple things you need to know about Sam. 

A. He is the nicest guy you will ever meet.

B. He speaks very slowly and talks a lot, leading you to want to punch him in the face sometimes. SPIT IT OUT SAM. 

C. He’s basically a dad. Makes dad jokes and just wants to find a girl to date long-term.

We went to dinner and then to a comedy show. Here’s the thing about someone you date, I’m about to drop a huge bomb on you: YOU HAVE TO LOVE THE PERSONS LAUGH. There is nothing worse than being with someone when you can’t stand their laugh. So at the end of the night we kissed, said goodbye and that was the end of it. So I thought. 

Sam never expressed to me how he felt. EVER. The next time he asked to hang out I actually had plans with friends. The next time, I was leaving for a long vacation early the next morning. When you have a group of close friends like we do, you can’t tell one person something without the rest of us finding out. 

After I got back from vacation, I hear that I’ve been leading Sam on. Now we barely talked after that night. We had just met and I knew nothing about him. I decided to ignore it and let the whole thing fizzle out and hopefully he would just accept it. That didn’t happen. Finally out one night with all our friends, I pull him aside and tell him that I’m sorry if he felt like I lead him on, but that I wasn’t interested in him as more than a friend and when friends date within each other, bad things happen. 

For the next four months, he would get drunk and profess his love for me to everyone except me. I don’t know whether to feel bad for Sam or not. He’s been hooking up with other people along the way, but I try not to do anything that would suggest I’m interested in any way. I’ve started to give him more and more space so that he can find someone he really likes. I hope that means with him not around as often I can find someone new as well. 


Goals = Empty Promises

Last night I lied to someone about what I’ve been doing with my life. I’ve written about 10 pages of a book. When I first came up with the concept for the novel, I was typing away and then something happened; I got bored. I thought to myself, “If you’re bored writing it, then who the fuck would want to read it.” I’ve always done that though. I’ve had creative ideas that I get bored with and give them up as quickly as they came. 

The same thing will probably happen with this blog. I don’t want it to, but why continue something when you’re bored of it. 

So last night my ex-boyfriends roommate called to catch up. He told me that he missed having me around and to be honest, yeah I miss it too. Of course I do, but the last thing I said to my ex was that I hated him and that he was an asshole. I can’t really take those things back, mainly because it was the truth. I listened and listen to him incessantly bitch about work, but he couldn’t remember the simplest things about my life. I’m surprised he even remembered my birthday. 

His roommate asked me what I’ve been up to and I told him I had 50 pages of my book completed. I also told him about how great I’ve been and I guess it was just to save face. I’d like to think that everyone has been in that situation. Especially because I don’t want my ex to know that I don’t really know what that next step is. 

Everyone is always so confident about their lives. Are we all just trying to save face? Maybe we’re all equally as confused and just don’t want to admit it to the world.